it hurts more than angry

why do i bother so much with what you think of me? im insecure i know. i look fierce, grumpy, cross, unhappy and this is the best i scare people with my looks. any idea how hurtful it is for me when i hear things like that all the time? i tried my best to brighten up more, smile more, be more cheerful. apparently it doesnt stand up to certain people's standard. im change for God. so why must these irritating comments come in whenever im trying so hard? i laugh, smile and joke with people i'm close with. not that i dont do that to strangers but it'll be more distant. so pls. dont give me any identity tags. likewise you wouldnt want any. btw, i have a perpetual frowning brow which it's fixed. like a scar im trying to arch erase off.

youthdna's event was a success =) despite long breaks and little hiccups overall from the look of the people playing, they really really enjoy it a lot. someone gave meihwa a nickname, woman commando. kewl... the weather was good, the games were fun, the people were enthusiastic... ah~ next event coming up soon =)

went for an early mother's day celebration, =) my ah ma went to church today!!! hooray!!! soon to join us!!! my cousin is expecting too!!! another addition. hopefully soon either one of my sisters will get married soon. i hope.

thinking: next time, if i dont smile, you give me a huge smile okie. and i promise to deliver a bigger one to you. =D
song: mighty river - the katinas